When a Father is Alienated From His Child
Parental alienators are often narcissists.
They see nothing they do as wrong. They have to get everyone on their side. Other’s impressions of them are of the utmost importance.
Parental alienation starts long before a divorce. A separation or divorce just puts fuel to the fire. It happens when one parent makes a sly “joke” or innuendo about the incompetency of the other parent in front of the child. It doesn’t stop there. They repeat it all to everyone they know.
They do not mind if the ex is in their child’s life as long as they do not interfere with the new family they create. For example, the mother does not want to explain to people that their new husband is not the father of their child. Remember, image is everything to them. The mother expects their child to call her new husband “dad” and to listen to him as if he were. The mother wants the child to feel their dad abandoned them, and that it is better with their new family. The mother tells the child that she wishes their father was more involved while simultaneously making innuendos about the father’s failings.
Here is one story of a father alienated. Macy and Don were married with one child. Macy always complained about Don working and that she wanted more material things. She wanted to own a home, not live in an apartment. Macy accumulated debt on his credit cards. She did not want to get a job to help. Macy finally got a job with Don’s help at a hotel. Macy wanted everyone to believe she was the perfect mother and wife, even when she was having an affair with an 18-year-old bell boy, James, at the hotel. On Christmas Day, while Don and his daughter went to mass Macy said she wanted to try a new church. She went to the non-denominational church with James. In January, Macy told Don her parents wanted Tiffany to visit with them. Macy moved out of their home. Macy decided she did not want to be married or a mother anymore. A couple of weeks later Tiffany told Don she wanted to come home. Don quit his job, picked up Tiffany, and moved in with his sister in the same state as the grandparents. Macy, possibly getting tired of her fling, moved in with her parents. Macy’s parents began getting complaints about Macy living in their home because it was a retirement community. Macy asked Don to take…
